The Hoax, Mind Control, The "Plant Experiment"..

 

What I am about to tell you will be difficult to believe, in fact there are things I must leave out, or your mind will switch off and understanding will be impossible.....

When I was in the 8^th or 9^th grade I built a Machine. I had no electrical knowledge, was pretty much an ordinary kid. This machine was hooked up to a Plant that my Dad said ,”had been in outer Space”. My Dad worked out OF NASA, Ames Research Center. He didn't work FOR NASA. This machine made it possible for there to be an auditory (and on an oscilloscope) response from the plant when it was harmed...when I tore it's leaves, or held a match to it, it would “scream”....It got so that all I had to do was think about harming it, and it would,”scream”. I had a ,”lab” out behind the house with all kinds of cool equipment, Radio Frequency generators, Oscilloscopes, something called a “signal Tracer”....TV's, Radios, a military short wave and all kinds of other stuff that I knew nothing about. I had a monthly,”science kit” delivered to our house. My Mom and Dad brought home equipment from where they worked. My Mom from Lockheed where she worked out of.....like my Dad she was not employed by Lockheed, just worked from there.....Some of the equipment they brought was in “trade” for me fixing TV's and Radios that supposedly belonged to people they worked with. My Mom was a Lifer for Military Intelligence, then went into …....something deeper. My Dad was a Lifer in the Military before he retired and went into something Deeper, out of the NASA facility. They were Both zealots......especially my Mom. She believed the Government was always right, that everything it did was for the good of the people, and once when I tried to talk to her about some evil thing like the Viet Nam war she sort of threatened me saying that I was talking Treason and a time was I could be shot for it, and I would deserve it. So, here I have all this equipment they brought home for me....OH, I'll mention here that just a few years ago I Googled my Mom's direct superiors name, G M...he was a Major or Colonel ...I just decided not to print his full name. It turns out he was Assistant Secretary of Defense....in charge of weapons. I did not know there was such a thing until I found FOIA declassified documents where he was requesting exemption from Radiation standards for operators of experimental weapons. Anyway so both parents were in Secret Military organizations, brought home all this equipment....and with it I built this incredible machine that I thought, once it was done, was an alarm system using a plant as a sentry..... that didn't turn out as I thought. So, how was I capable of doing this with no electrical knowledge. Well, one day a voice came into my head, I sort of went into a …...well, I called it, “zoning out”...and this must have been Summer Vacation....I was “zoned out” most of the time....basically not there but in my head listening to this voice telling me how to build this machine....and fix this equipment (“for trade”).... I'd be at the dinner table, day after day, 'Zoned out”...Did my parents act like it was at all odd.....? Nope. So, I don't think it took very long, I hooked up all this equipment and had a probe (needle with a wire) going into a large plant root. OH, this plant was something I don't think I've ever seen since (I'm a plant guy too)....it was sort of like a grass, or more like a bamboo, but very sensitive, it would draw back from the touch, was about 4 feet high. So I built this machine and I guess all the times I had burned it, or thought about burning it sensitized it because if I came within 30 feet of it, it would “SCREAM”...The machine made a loud wailing sound like an alarm......hence my idea that it was an alarm where you could use a plant as a sentry. Now we didn't ever talk in my family....never had conversations with my parents,”children were to be seen and not heard” was their Mantra. I suppose this had to do with their line of work.....But when I finished with the Machine I was very excited and wanted to show my folks....(OH, during this time my Moms boss would show up a few times at the house, that had never happened before....I knew my Mom had a crush on the guy and just thought that had something to do with it....he was always spit polished and in a Dress Uniform) ...anyway I told my folks I wanted them to see it...My Mom was really weird, she refused and was kind of ...catatonic, just sitting there staring at nothing..... My Dad agreed. The plan was that he would step off the back porch and the Plant that was in my Lab would start Wailing like it did when I stepped off the back porch....He stepped off and nothing happened, he walked all the way over and nothing happened but a little peep when he was touching it. I figured something became disconnected or some adjustment was off, I stepped off the back porch and it started wailing like an alarm. My Dad said Nothing, turned and walked into the house....very weird like my Mom, sort of like in a trance. I was crestfallen....here I thought I had done something monumental that might actually get their attention for once....and Nothing. The voice that had instructed me for however long and was ever present in my mind.....was gone. I don't know, it's weird, I just put the whole thing out of my mind....set it away like it never happened. I went on about my life and had some pretty intense things happen on a more spiritual level...but won't go into that here. Then about ….quite a few years later I had a strange experience. I had a motor home and it was parked at my parents, I was taking a nap when …..well, I had previously done a lot of,”astral projecting”....not on purpose, it was a problem. I'd be laying down then instantly was out of my body floating around, watching my wife cooking dinner or whatever, cruising down the street....I had a difficult time getting back in my body, this happened a lot. It freaked me out, I spent a day with the phone book desperately trying to find someone to help me. I found a Psychic in San Francisco who told me to get some Valerian Tea and make it Very very strong and drink that before bed....That did the trick....well anyway back to the story, years later I'm in my motorhome and I am taking a nap....I'm not sure if this is even relevant, but it happened this way so am including it. Suddenly I was out of my body, but not like before, I was in my etheric body...my energetic body. I was trying to move but was like very hard (later found this was called sleep paralysis) but I had a extremely highly developed WILL, and was able to move in this etheric body a few feet, it was like moving 5 hundred pounds.... Then I was back in my body, awake.....AND THE VOICE WAS BACK,,,,,,,,It started talking to me telling me about this Machine that could cure any symptom of disease. It had two basic parts, first a part that 'Read” energy fields....frequency...that determined what was going on in the body energetically....with a computer (this was prior to what we know as computers, what I “saw” was as big as a room....this computed isolated frequencies, set baselines for what was a healthy energetic state for various “Centers” and organs etc......The second part was what did the healing by bringing areas out of Health (frequency) ….back to the proper frequency. It was a chamber where high energy light was broken into the various colors …...of the rainbow..... different frequencies of Light that could be blended and mixed and focused on the areas needing to be re-aligned. WOW!!! Holy CRAP! I got very excited and ran into my parents house to find pencil and paper and start writing it out...I mean, Holy Crap, a cure for mankind's Ills. So I got back out there and the voice say's right away, “You can't do anything with this information”....,”excuse me?”. It said that there was 2 reasons I could not put this out there. The first reason was that most disease had deep roots, many were Karmic....and although the machine could realign the manifestation....it could do nothing about the roots, and these things had to work themselves out. He said removing one manifestation, would simply force another that could potentially be worse, as in supposedly curing a virus with a vaccine only pushes it to manifest in a slightly different form. “Cure Polio, and get AIDS” That was the first reason, the second reason was that just as diseases have very distinct,”energetic signatures”....so do every thought and emotion a person can have, and the machine was capable of replicating any thoughts or emotions that the machines operators wanted to.....basically controlling peoples minds. He said that the technology was in pieces in Russia, the USA and Israel. I knew nothing about Israel but knew Russia and USA were having a “cold war” so I extrapolated that he was telling me that the technology didn't exist because these nations were not in collusion....Well not being able to cure mankinds ill's was a big let down.

Many years later, maybe 20 years ago I'm working at my sanding machine, kind of in, ”the zone"...ZEN'd into it. And the voice comes back. It tells me that the technology currently existed that could basically target any person anywhere on the planet. He said that the frequencies could be targeted using quite a few different modalities. He said, RF frequencies, HAARP, he said even precise chemical compounds could be designed to elicit the proper vibratory frequency blend required to say, create Fear or specific thoughts. He said that even very precise color blending (gave the example of Half Time TV presentations at major games)....could all be manipulated for specific response.

OK, so we know that humans are electrical, every cell is a unit of energy, every gland and organ has an electrical element. He said that very specific frequencies could be aimed anywhere on the planet to bring about just about any physical effect or thought.....

You know when I think about telling this to people I think of what would be an automatic response, “That's CRAZY, are you saying that specific frequencies could be put out into the air and magically have some effect far away, some detailed and very specific effect....that's Crazy.” I think how should I respond to that?. Maybe I should just tell them to go into the other room and watch TV, or listen to the Radio. Watch things totally not there in the room, in great detail, epic stories projected upon a screen, incredible music coming out of a plastic Box.

Well here we are today, A Hoax of monumental proportions being played out upon the people of the world. THOUSANDS of Satellites floating in Space covering the entire Planet with Directed Frequencies. These frequencies can easily manifest the symptoms of any disease....they can create damage to the body that releases exosomes that are named,COVD-19. They can make people believe that Compliance with an insane narrative is for their own good, and is their own idea.

I finally put it together that when the “Voice” came to me the second time it was explaining how they managed to have me build the plant machine years before....they simply beamed it into my head. The technology already existed at that time and my Mom had volunteered me as a test subject..... I remember her saying that sometimes we have to make sacrifices for our Government because our government acts for the Greater Good. She radically believed this..... I had no idea she was talking about how she had thrown me to the wolves for the “greater good” of humanity.

I am very sensitive to energy fluctuation now, possibly a side effect of the initial.....experiment. Right now....whew, there is an all encompassing very intense frequency blanketing everywhere I've been on the planet. It's like a loud ringing in my ears, and my wife's and many of my friends. If we get under a couple layers of Mylar, get it wrapped around us...... the sound goes away....That tells me it isn't something internal to all of us, but external.......For a while now it's been intense and getting stronger every day. The frog in boiling water analogy comes to mind.....Last night in the middle of the night.....it was shut off. OMG, such a quiet I haven't heard in so long. It was wonderful. I was wondering what was going on. Sadly, later it came back on......at an even stronger level. Maybe they were re calibrating their equipment.

Here's the thing. There is no COVD-19. That is the cover. There is an agenda of depopulation and control of monumental proportions taking place right now....Beamed from a Satellite or cell tower near you. Vaccines and chemtrails fill humans with aluminum, making them virtual antennas, while destroying their TH1 immunity which is what protects them from Virus's and bacteria..... This is a scientific Fact and the reason the Aluminum is in the vaccines in the first place. If it were not there the immune response to the toxins injected, would be devastating and no one would be crazy enough to Vaxx, and Trillions of dollars to evil men would dry up.

The population is the frog in the boiling water, and they are slowly turning up the heat.

You are under assault, your are being manipulated to believe a False story ….the Truth I know seems beyond belief and if I hadn't lived my peculiar life....I doubt I'd believe what I am telling you.

Wake up at 3 AM, and just listen. Quiet your mind, sit in the dark......if you are the least bit sensitive you will see and hear for yourself....... GET SHIELDED....and refuse the Tyranny. Those thoughts of compliance, are not your own.....

I am very healthy and have no thought of Clintonizing myself...... just saying....

Reply to Lucy

 Professor: Nag

4/12/1363

Forgiveness / Forgive, Forget

"Forgiveness is Great, Right ?

" Wrong !

Forgiveness is another religious concept that has been distorted

to control the masses of sheep.

Let me explain the problem with forgiveness:

Unless we have been physically hurt by another person,

and even that can only hurt our bodies,

not our souls,

 our pain is self inflicted.

The whipmaster is an ego

whose job it is to keep us in the track of seeking pleasure

and avoiding pain,

which is a round about way of denying us our souls...

denying us our souls being the ego's primary job.

Actually the ego's primary job is self preservation

and the soul is the one thing that the ego fears most,

as it is it's destroyer.

The reality of the pain we believe others inflict upon us

is that our ego's inflicts it upon ourselves.

They may be standing over there saying "blah blah blah blah,"

but we turn it into a transgression by our ego's reaction to it.

Forgiveness implies and in the process validates a transgression

that doesn't exist anywhere except in our own minds

and our consequent emotional reaction to that.

Possibly that person is attempting to inflict emotional pain

or mental confusion upon us,

and possibly their intentions are not "good",

but that is their problem to deal with.

If we take their problem unto ourselves

with our judgments and emotional turmoil....

who then is playing the ego's fool?

Therefore in our high and mighty forgiveness

we are actually the ones transgressing Peace.

We are transgressing Spirit

by placing blame on someone

for doing something to us that we have really done to ourselves.

Placing blame is just another ego tool

to move stuff around in the web of our ego created illusion,

to make us feel a little more comfortable.

It's important to understand that whenever we forgive,

we are also placing blame/judgment.

So there is no evolution,

there is no letting go.

We may have, in all our wonderful goodness

granted this person our forgiveness,

but first we had to blame them for doing something to us,

that we actually did to ourselves.

Blame is as much a transgression

as whatever it is they did that we have forgiven.

Even Steven / No evolution.

As far as forgiving and forgetting goes:

When we say we are forgetting, we are wrong,

first of all we are creating that negative thing we say we are going to forget,

then we stuff it away in a dark corner of our mind.

Humans never really forget short of brain damage...

And then our created transgressions will manipulate us

in the future

from the dark corners where they hide.

The bottom line is that nobody really does anything to us,

we do it to ourselves by our mental and emotional reaction to it.

Even a physical blow does not touch our soul,

unless we, through a lot of negative energy, let it.

And now we have all those little demons

that we can't even see,

manipulating us from their dark corners...

very counter productive.

When we learn to free ourselves from the cords of man

and find our rightful place in the web of Spirit,

it will be impossible for us to be "hurt" by our fellow man.

We will discuss this later in the term.

Replace forgiveness with

 "Simply Loving".

Homework: Write something about forgiveness. What was learned today in class?

Applied Magic 101

Jeff Wilson

Professor: Nag

4/12/1363

Homework:

Forgiveness:

Forgiveness implies a transgression where none has occurred.

The implication of a transgression by the person "forgiving"

is as much of a transgression as the one that is supposedly being forgiven.

A soul can not be transgressed,

only an ego.

Forgiveness is an act of ego

that only serves to bolster the ego.

Forgiveness comes from blame,

Judgment

and self inflicted emotional turmoil.

Blame is as much a transgression as whatever we are forgiving.

Don't forgive ....

Simply Love!

The White Hall

The White Hall

I'm writing this today because I've re discovered a better place to go than Facebook to Communicate those things that matter most to me,(which don't seem to matter to too many people in the General Population) at least I hope it's better. I went to this "Spiritual Forum) years ago but became disillusioned because there were so many people going there just to......wallow in their "spiritual materialism". People who had read books or were just making stuff up, and were spouting things that they knew nothing about with great authority. What bothered me most was in areas where damage could be done because folks had just enough information to make what they shared dangerous. This was most apparent in areas such as Kundalini Yoga and Astral Projection/Travel... Where the wrong info applied by a person with a decent degree of Intention Development could damage themselves.... ( I know, I cheated and did most of the things my Teachers told me not to.....OUCH ). Anyway this place is a Spiritual forum you can find here.

What I'm talking about now is going to be what I call ,"the White Hall"...in response to a persons query to my use of the word in a thread about Death and the "Afterlife".

Since my Teachers didn't really use Language to teach, but more a Guided Experience....I've had to make up terms for all the things I experienced, and this can be problematic. The "White Hall is a perfect example because there are two places where I use this term.....and I'm not entirely positive that they are describing the same place.  So I'll explain both.

The First time I remember in this Life going there was on the night of the day that I had what some call ,"an initiation".   

I was this Normal seeming guy...it was 1970, or maybe early 1971. I had hiked up this little mountain called Mt. Helen or Ellen in the Santa Cruz Mtn's.  This is a picture I took on that actual day.

Well the experience I had is a common one...well fairly common. I was just sitting there on top of the mountain overwhelmed by the beauty I was seeing...I started to Cry and thought," I wish I could keep this feeling forever".....my thought at the time was I wished I had a camera, that that would somehow save the experience. he he.  Then a little voice in my head said,"Take it all in your mind, like a camera".  I opened my eyes really wide and tried to see everything all at once.  Next thing you know I Flash into this Light...brighter than anything on Earth..or the Sun....It's Bliss, then suddenly it's like I'm sitting on the outer edge of Creation, looking back in....and.... and what I saw was this Huge Golden Web of points of connected Light. ( I hadn't taken any drugs for those of you who might like to think that, I hadn't tried them YET, but started smoking pot right after that.)   But Everything about me Changed then.  I could "Feel" the Trees....I could listen to them.....and they led me immediately to a Bookstore in Palo Alto where I re connected with a Teacher from my last life.   Blah, blah, blah..... Anyway,  that night when I went to sleep I found myself in what I came to call, "The White Hall"... I called it that because it was nothing but White Light and the only outstanding feature was a man in front of me, in a white robe, teaching me stuff I would read the following day in White Magic by Alice Bailey, and a book on the Yoga Sutras of Patanjili...and one on Tibetan Yoga and Secret Doctrines.   I was only ever able to see his hands, each time I tried to look at his face I would dissolve into this Blissful White Light.... So I quit trying.  Well I found myself there every night, and it was so trippy how the Techniques he taught me, I'd read about the next day, then Practice....And it was so easy..... (wish it still was, but I didn't listen once when I really should have....and am still paying the price for that.) 

So that was what I first called ,"the White Hall".

I have to say though that it sort of Morphed over many years. At first it was just me and him....and all white.  But later there was a whole bunch of people (and strange animals) and the lessons were not just conveyed one to one telepathically, but rather as ....HMMM??? Experiences....like tests is a "real" world...and the Hall became very Ornate, everything was like a Treasure..... So, that is the first place I used the term.

Then I was shown what I came to call, "Yoga of the Death State", which basically was dying without cutting that silver cord.  And the main lesson here, the purpose of the whole teaching was to get me, "to the Light".....without falling into all the sidetracks (heavens, hells, constructs etc.) that tempt our attention in the "In Between Time".

Now what I have referred to here as ,"the White Hall" is that place you come into after you have spent as much time as possible in the Light.  The whole purpose of my learning how to die, was so I could get to the Light....and learn to stay there as long as possible... This is where Hyper Evolution is possible.   For those of you that have experienced this through Kriya or NDE's or whatever, you know what I'm talking about.    It was a problem for me because my teachers had a "rule of Three"....which I suppose I was supposed to follow, But in this case I didn't. And I did the yoga of the death state as often as I could.....and each time I went into "the Light"...I came out a totally different person.  This isn't so much a problem when you die, because folks in your new life have no idea who you used to be, and get to know who you are.  But when you totally change on a daily basis into a completely different person..... the folks around you, "here"....kind freak out.  This is a whole different story. Anyway after the time we spend ,"in the Light"... we come into this place that I have called, for lack of a better word, "the White Hall"....because it's all White and once again we are with Teachers and we are being Guided in creating the basic outline for our next life...an outline that will best serve our evolution...and the evolution of our Group.... As this is our souls prime directive....evolution that is. 

The Truth About Chemtrails and HAARP

OK, just to be on the safe side I'm going to call this little bit of Truth....Fiction

So there's been a lot of supposition about why these people find it necessary to spray toxic elements from airplanes.... 

The whole world over.

We've seen them "refueling" one of their planes twice above our house.

Two Huge planes connected up, right over us.

 Then spraying out their huge clouds in crisscross patters all across the sky.

Well there are a lot of ideas floating around out there about this..... but the truth is scarier than all of those ideas.

 But first to explain this I have to give you some background:

If you haven't read the part under,"Coming out of the scary Weirdness Closet about meeting the "German" and the mind control Healing Machine

Click here

And scroll down to those two chapters.

A short summation is that ,"the German" was a voice that entered my head when I was a young teen, just long enough to instruct me in the building of a machine that allowed a plant to express emotion auditorilly, and on the screen of an oscilloscope. 

He was alive at that time and probably in a building at Ames Research Center (NASA).

As soon as the project was done, he disappeared from my head for a number of years.

Later on, when he had been killed, his voice came back and told me about a Machine capable of healing most of Mankind's ailments.... but also capable of controlling minds.

I'm not going into all this now...

But suffice to say,

He's Back.

I've been doing my best to shut him out.

He approaches me on the Fifth Ray...

which you can probably Google if you don't know what that means... It doesn't really matter.... but the Fifth Ray for me is ....

HMMM?  It's like a whirlpool that pulls me into Patterns of Knowledge..

That just go on and on..... 

and kind of take me away....

On long journeys of discovery.

But I don't have time for that...

Takes all my time these days just to survive and pay the bills...

So I've attempted to avoid Him..

But it's becoming impossible.

So He's back and telling me more things....

And the most recent little bit of info was regarding chemtrails..

This is all in his area of expertise, he was head of the Mind Control Project back in the late 60's early 70's.

So here's the deal...

The Chemtrails are used for Mind Control...

Here is how it works.

Thoughts and emotions have very specific ,"energy signatures."

Thirty years ago ,"the Machine" was able to define specific energy signature of differing emotions and very specific thoughts.

It was also able to replicate these signatures on many levels.

With Radio Frequencies,

with Light Frequencies

and with elemental combinations.

It was entirely possible at this point to make people think or feel whatever the ones in control wanted to make them think or feel.

The German told me back in the early 70's that they were able to use certain elemental combinations to create certain emotions (generally anger and Fear).

And that they were able to use the RF frequencies and even just the proper combinations of color on a television screen, to bring about certain thoughts and emotions in people. 

This was how they created the Plant Machine through me

when I had no clue about what I was doing.

I was just a guinea pig in that little experiment.

But that was all many years ago and the science has come a long way.

Now we have things like HAARP, that can bounce thought and emotional patterns off the atmosphere...to any given point on the planet.

And what they have found is that by using a combination of the methods (light,rf,and elemental) they can make anyone think and do whatever they want.

If you take note of the News, which I try my best no to...

you will see a lot of things happening lately.

The murders in CO. And also various places around the world where poor folks who fit the right profiles are used to help further certain agenda's..

Like taking away your ability to protect yourself...

They use things like guilt and fear and the idea that eating certain diets (that are contrary to good health)...

are the right thing to do.

They make people believe the most obvious of lies,,,

like Sept 11th,

Like the death of Osama Bin Laden,

And keep the Sheep in their pens, believing that the Shepherds have their best interests at heart..

Even as the Shepherds are murdering people worldwide....millions of em

for greed...

And they even get the poor sheep to finance the mass murder.

So, the Chemtrails are simply a specific combination of elements that resonate at certain frequencies, that can be further stimulated through various means... (the color combinations at half time of the most popular football games).

Color and sound combinations on a movie screen...

Chemical combinations in your processed foods...

And bounced off the atmosphere right into your home.

Your thought and emotions are no longer entirely your own.

It's time to quiet our minds and emotions and listen to our souls.

This is, and actually has always been the road to true freedom.

Humpty Dumpty and the Ghost

Humpty Dumpty and the Ghost

This post has been a long time coming...

and it'll probably be a long time going...as in a long freakin post..

And unless you are interested in having your ideas about reality seriously expanded into some weird new regions,

I'd forget about reading this...

and go do something else. 

I'm about to share some things here that I haven't even wanted to share with myself...

And it's difficult to know where to start.

Right now I'm having some physical body difficulties.

A great deal of Pain.

I can walk for about 5 minutes...

before I can barely move my right leg without tremendous pain.

It sucks.

I can't bend my knee to get down and work in the garden.

I can't walk around Market and visit folks...

And it's all because of Humpty Dumpty and the Ghost..

Or maybe I can blame it on my Teachers

in my last life...

Or my repressed anger towards them..

Well , no

I know the exact moment

the exact decision and action that I took

that led me to this.

and to the Cancer

that I had removed about 15 years ago.

(Sharing enough yet?)..

So I've been going to Physical Therapy to address

THE SYMPTOMS

of that Choice and action...

 I'm about to tell you the story of what got me here.

In hopes that it will open some doors for me to 

Reverse the Choice

that led to all this.

So I guess I'll begin with some History

that will be useful in understanding the 

Big Picture here.

In my past life I lived in a Monastery in Tibet.

I had 2 primary Teachers.

That really pissed me off... he he

I'm finally admitting this 

because I think it's central to what got me here.

This Life was spent mostly in Meditation

and exploring the boundaries of what is Humanly possible.

(here's a tip.... ANYTHING)

But the Chinese soldiers were coming.

We could have run...

we could have hidden,

or we could have simply bowed down to them...

And Lived.

My teachers knew this.

But they said that our time,

isolated from the rest of world was over

that all over the world the isolated groups like us,

were making the conscious choice...

to spread out across the Globe.

And this was done mostly through the help of

the bullets of the Oppressors.  

We were told to allow them to kill us...

I had a slight problem with that...

But I agreed.

We were given the choice of bow down and live.

Or stand up and die.

We all died,

but unfortunately I couldn't bear to look into the eyes

of the soldier....

I was towards the middle of the row of monks.

They went one by one shooting us in the heads.

And when my turn came I couldn't bear to look into the face of the soldier..

it wasn't so much fear....

but I couldn't bear to "see" him.

And I cast my eyes down.

( I had conveniently forgotten this little guilt creating choice, until I was reminded about it by an old guy earlier in this Life...

who just happened to be there when he was a young man in this one)

You can read a little about that in my "Coming out of the Scary Weirdness closet" post here: Scroll down to Section 6C

So my last thought before I was shot was,

OH, CRAP..... my Brothers will think I was bowing down when I lowered my eyes.

I've carried a lot of guilt about that....

But the whole reason I mention this

 is just so you'll understand why,

in this Life...

I only listened to my Teachers when I felt like it. 

Because in 1970 after my "Experience" on that Mountain..

(which you can also probably read about under the link posted above)...

My teachers returned to my Life...

in a big freakin way.

Only difference was they didn't have bodies attached.

So that was pretty monumental.

And we took up right where we had left off in the previous life.

Mainly exploring the boundaries...

or lack thereof

of the Universe.

This brings us to a primary practice which I've dubbed,

"Yoga of the Death State".

Which was basically going through the whole process of Dying,

without cutting that silver cord that binds us to our bodies...

And this "Yoga's" purpose was not just to learn a lot of interesting stuff..

but to amplify evolution.

You see every time we die,

at least once we're at a certain evolutionary stage,

(past the halfway point on the wheel)

the amount of time we spend "in the Light" part of the death experience...

The more we evolve.

The whole rule for this Yoga was..

Don't be distracted by the Heavens and Hells

or anything else...

and go straight to the Light..

And stay in it as long as possible.

(of course I cheated a few times....WHEW!

(if you want to know more about the death process I'm sure I've written about it on my Mystic Orb blog, just use the "search" option at the top right of the page).

So ....

I was a maniac...

My teachers told me to only do this yoga a limited amount...

in fact it was probably under conditions of their,

"Rule of Three".

They had this thing called the rule of Three...

Basically they said we humans are way too habitual Creatures..

And they were showing me how to do some AMAZING things.

But they said if I did any of them more than three time..

I would become habituated to them

and they would become a hindrance....

This is one of those cases where my deep seated repressed anger made me do just what I wanted..

So I spent a lot of time 

basically dying and going 

"Into the Light".

Well this has a very dramatic effect.

When we do it when we are really dead,

it's no big freakin deal because

we're born again in a whole new body, as a baby

and folks get to know us slowly.

But when we are doing it, 

when we are alive...

each time we come out of it...

we're a totally different person from the one who went in.

Because that Light..

and the longer we spend in it...

is what evolves us.. in the death state

(after that midway in evolution point).

So  the outside world,

and most notably my girlfriend,

would suddenly be faced with a totally different person than she knew the day before.

(you can read a little about this in section 5 of the link above)

But the upshot was.....

She eventually freaked.....

And I made the 

HMM???

what's the word...

CRAZIEST 

decision a human could make.

And one I doubt many LIVING  souls

have ever made.

(although maybe one in a million DEAD souls make it...

as it's where "Ghosts" come from.)

I literally became a Living Ghost as the outcome of what I've come to call,

My Humpty Dumpty Episode.

(also written about a little in the Coming out of the Scary Weirdness Closet).

So I'm going to tell you where ghosts come from.

There is something that humans have that I've dubbed,

"the Construct"

It probably has an official name, but I don't know it.

Basically it is our souls Astral Reflection.

It is an energetic pattern so to speak..

of who we WERE.

Note that it is past tense.

It's also what folks see when they die,

if they are still in the "tunnel"

as their "dearly departed loved ones"

Because we don't see our group....

inside the "tunnel"

(which by the way is the spinal column).

We do see our "group right outside of it...

Anyway

All the energy of thought and emotion that has gone into defining us..... has by Law got to manifest after a certain amount of time.

So all except very new souls have this construct...

which is literally like a shadow that follows us around on the astral plane..

Which by the way is the area we pass through on "death".

And once we get past the halfway point in our evolution....

where our souls process changes from collecting...

to discarding....

this construct begins to ...

break apart.

It's like with every...

evolutionary step we take..

part of that construct sheds off,

like skin from a snake...

yet it still kind of floats for a time in the orbit of the construct.

That Astral Law of Magnetism

Anyway, a ghost is a soul that instead of going forward through the death process....

which is Normal

it looks back upon it's construct...

(I think a lot of old Myths were built around this)

the whole "turning to stone or salt or whatever" 

And because of Laws of the Astral Plane where this occurs...

it is drawn towards...

and merges with it's construct...

Basically binding itself to who it WAS.

Well when my girlfriend

(who I loved deeply, or so I thought)

was FREAKING

and begging me to go back to ,

"Who I was"..

And considering that at that moment I could "see"

all her future.... choices aiding her evolution...

I said,

"If I do will you come to the "light" with me."

She said yes....

It suited me to believe that..

and against my teachers basically yelling,

I did my little Yoga of the Death State,

Broke a major rule,

and turned to look at my construct....

And By doing that, all those 

Pieces of myself that had been shed like a skin..

came crashing back to me.

(the Law of Magnetism is pretty freakin MAJOR on the astral plane).

Which is why the most important lesson my teachers gave me about dying was...

Keep focused upon the Light...

and don't be distracted....

But the problem was, 

 all these pieces originally were collected in a very precise order.

"Everything in it's place".

But this lame ass move brought them all crashing back to me...

just a big mish mash.

And when I came out of it...

I could no longer hear my teachers,

I could no longer see my girlfriends

  Path and choices... 

And I was a freakin Psychic Mess.

I was totally OPEN

Like Autistic..

And I felt all the emotions, physical pains

 and thoughts of people within about a city block.

And I lived in a densely populated area of apartments....

YIKES!!!!!

I didn't last long.

The only way I could survive..

Was by going into the Light....

And I was a Telephone Man..

Going into the Light on the top of a Pole..

Wasn't conducive to my health..

I also was working inside in "frames".

But one day I went into the Light...

and couldn't come out...

They took me home....

I had to quit my job and move into a VW bus with my then wife...

as far from humans as possible.

I also had this ability to heal folks....

which was pretty cool, 

but Not.

Because the way it worked was,

someone would come into our camp..

And I was wide open,

so it was like all of their 'Stuff"

was inside of me...

And generally I'd like go into these 

Kundalini convulsions.

And the only way I could get out of it,

was by going Into the Light.....

And when I did...

they were cured and I wasn't convulsing any more...

Well you know this society isn't set up to support folks just sitting up on some mountain In the Light.

The medical profession medicated me

which didn't help much...

And I really wanted to be part of the world...

or at least felt like there were no other options...

So I made a conscious choice.....

You see when we are wide open

everything comes in through our belly region.

Like for me, near the base of the spine ..

And I found that I could maintain my solidity

around humans.... If I blocked that incoming energy,

where it came in.

I had done it at other levels up and down my spine but it caused immediate problems,

but I found if I blocked it before it came in...

I could Deal...

 I knew also that blocking energy...
.. is at the base of much disease...

(as is over amplified energy).

But on that day in the late 70's I decided to attempt to become

part of the world...

And I willfully put an energetic block at the base of my spine...

I told my wife that it'd be a problem in 20 years...

and in about that time

I got cancer

(the oncologist said it was a slow growing kind and probably took about 13 years).

It was more like 20...

So I had that cut out...

But refused to even question myself about the Block I had put there..

Because I knew it was still there,

and didn't want to face that....

But now I am....
whether I want to or not...

and can barely walk....

And the question is....

How do I remove it...

or

Am I willing to.

Because without it.....

There's just too damn much coming in...

Because removing it is really just also a conscious choice.

And if I do......

Then I can be who I really am....

But I'm afraid.

And the reality is, it isn't what comes in to me..

that is the problem...

it's what I attach to what comes in...

It's when I attach my own stuff to it..

Because guess what...

what does us harm on energetic levels is NEVER 

"out there".

There are people and entities that may have negative intentions...and even energetic actions towards us...

but unless we attach our own stuff to it...

no harm can be done.

And sometimes in the dark

at a drum circle where all I'm doing is drumming

and I'm High...

I can drop the block

and let it all in

without attaching anything but Love to it....

And I know this is the answer..

But I've never allowed it in the Light of Day..

And it's not just my fear of what will "come in"

But also 

in a major way,

my fear of what my Loved Ones will think

if they were to see me

as I really am.

It made my first wife hysterical....

The Choice

The Choice

Lifetime after Lifetime,

Fighting for Justice

Unable not to when

confronted by ...

Humanity...

Doing it's evil deeds.

Forever Exposing it

Then cutting it off..

Relentless....

A Prisoner of the Passion

For Unity..

And they tease me and taunt me..

In roles of Power they kill my fellow men..

And say I can do nothing but stand by and watch

Because they Have all the Power...

And the masses have been lied to for so long

they don't have much of a clue as to what is really going on...

But that was my Yesterday

And the day before that....

Now 

I simply want to Be.

You don't have to wait to die

To go to Heaven

Pretty much you just have to ACCEPT it

Here and Now.

The "Here and Now" that is Eternity.

You just gotta drop the Shackles

And Accept.

When I see the most recent manipulations

trickling out through the media

Setting up the Masses on a nice line

to their destruction..

I wanna jab,

I wanna .....

Yell

Come on People

Open your eyes...

And don't Buy the Lie...

Because I gotta quit feeling responsible 

for fixing it..

I can't fix it..

My Job now is to

Live in Peace

Simply

What "they" do..

isn't my concern...

So I'm thinking that maybe if I write out a List

Of all the Lies I can think of that the Masses are now,

and have been fed..

Just get it out of my system..

Out "There"...  

where I can be done with it...

Then I can get on with my Job of

Being AT Peace

We only "Win"

When we give up the Battle..

We can not, "Fight for Peace"

We can 

Simply Be At Peace

Simply

Be

AT

PEACE